What A Beast.

Yeah.
The picture actually has something to do with what I'm ranting about this time.

Love.

Honestly... The phrase that keeps popping into my head randomly for the past few days has been, "Wow... Life is kinda sucking right now."

I mean, there's issues at home, and it seems there there's issues (Although they're not quite as bad) everywhere else...

And the worst thing is, I think all the other issues are because I'm getting really jealous, and it's annoying the freakin' heck out of me. Like, I get these nasty (As in mean, not gross...) thoughts in my head, and I know I'm just jealous of others because... Blah...


I don't want to lose my best friend again.

M'kay? Is that so bad!? I feel like a terrible person, and I hate being like this, and it's almost enough to make me want to start cutting, or go back to making myself puke and such (Maybe I'll tell about that another time... But I haven't done it for a few weeks now. Yes. The proper term for that is Bulimia) but then... Ah, I couldn't do that.
Especially cutting... I don't have a very high pain tolerance.

Honestly. I feel like a jerk-douche-terribleperson-non-loving-freak.
Ah, he's my best friend, but then I hear about these girls who have become his new friends, and they're all flirting with him and stuff, most likely. (I mean, when they first met him they told him he was cute. And that was their reason for asking for his phone number.)

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As I said before I'm jealous... And I don't like it, I really don't...



But whatevs. I just keep telling myself that I'm just overly jealous and being a total, not nice freak. Nothing like what a friend should be...


I'm sorry.



Ah. And then to top it all off I shattered the screen on my phone.
Yeah, I cried... I knew that my dad was going to make me pay for the next phone, and just so many things were going through my mind then too... Blah. I kinda felt like I exploded. Through my eyes.

Well, I think it's time for a story.
And, being as the odd person I am, it'll be in a new Blog post for various reasons:
One, because it'll be more organized and cute and stuff.
Two, because it kinda doesn't have as much to do with this post.


Jealousy is a beast.