If You Be My Star

Once upon a time there was a girl named Merecedes. She was entering her Junior year of high school, filled with ambitions and hopes, hurt trapped away and covered with silly songs of love and joy.
Unlike the year before, she started this year with a best friend in tow. The young sir's name was Rich, and she couldn't imagine a better day than just playing games or watching movies with this boy.
As the year progressed she got involved in a few things like Theater and various clubs, meanwhile her and Rich slowly drifted apart.
His stupid, bitchy girlfriend ruined everything and created a lot of heartache and drama, and he never got over her, and by the looks of things now, probably won't ever get over.
Merecedes has now moved out to the middle of butt-fuck-nowhere, aka, the other side of town, and doesn't live as close to Rich anymore.
Things sucked for a while.
Fuuuuuuuuuuckkk.
Her life.

Wow. This story sucks. I'm gonna skip to the good part.

But then Merecedes made new best friends, considering Rich had replaced her with a bunch of freshmen girls that drooled over him all day. And now she is VERY happy.
Of course, her and Rich still talk and such, but she got sick of dealing with all his fucked up shit.
And now she is content.
She isn't quite as scared of the future anymore.
Her brother is in JDC and everyday she has at least one person tell her what an idiot he is.
But it's okay, because she doesn't blame herself anymore.
Because it's not her fault.
And she's tried a few things that she used to never even give a second thought about.
Smoking cigarettes.
Drinking alcohol.
And neither of them were as great as everyone had made them out to be, so she didn't do either anymore. (Maybe a few more cigarettes, but she is for reals done with that, and getting her friends to quit, too.)

But she tried them.
And it was great, because she felt alive, and free, because she made the choice all by herself to do those things, and she also made the choice to not do those things again.

And she's happy.

And she doesn't need a fucking guy.
Like, legit. No sarcasm and stuff.
If one comes along that interests her a bit, she might try something, see how things work and if she likes it.
But really, that's not even an issue anymore.

Although she would like to just make out with either that Brazilian exchange student, or the German exchange student, just because.

I would say 'The End'
but I don't believe it's finished yet.

You're beautiful, and I love you!

Gosh. That was my favorite picture out of my first set.
Now it's all edited and stuff and looks pretty badass, if I do say so myself. Haha.
I'm a nerd.
:P

Speaking of nerds.... Rich's gameboy got stolen!! D:
And the worst part was that his pokemon game was stolen as well... The one with the completed pokedex on it. :(

Luckily, though, Platinum comes out in less than a week! I reserved a copy of it at toys R us for his birthday, so at least he'll have a new game soon. :P


Aaagghh.... I love everyone.
:D


Last friday was real nice. :)
I can't remember if I've blogged about it......

...

Nope.

Me and Becca went to Nutty's. (A local bar) But don't worry!! I didn't drink any alcohol! :D
It all tastes bad anyways. xP
We just went to see the bands play, because it was an all ages show.
There ended up being no mosh pit, but it was still good. :)
Becca's boyfriend was real scary though...... I thought he was going to eat her.
Like, fo shizz. He stared at her so intently. and he always looked quite angry. D:

Anywaysssss....

We had another Italy meeting last night and I'm even more excited!!!! AH!
This summer is going to be so great. :)
And T-mo switched us to a different airline and stuff so we won't have a layover in Amsterdam.

Dang.... And I was hoping to go smoke some pot too...
JUST KIDDING! :P

But I am so excited for Italy! teehee. :)



And I have lots of homework to do, so I'm gonna go!

Nighty night! I love you! :D

Love Life And Life Will Love You Back

Look what I can do!
Haha. All these pictures above were taken by me on my Canon FT QL. (Given to me by Libby. :D LOVE)
I seriously am thinking that photography is what I want to do in life... Like, I'm pretty sure that's what I'm gonna go to college for, and I really hope that I can end up being a photographer for a living.
That's nice.
I like it.

And I get a Canon Rebel XTi for my birthday!! ah! Love! everywhere! :D

LOOK AT IT:

Isn't it pretty? :)

I'm going to name it Hemmingway, I think.
That just sounds right. ;D

My polaroid Sun 600's name is Ruth and I think my FT QL's name is Stegosaurus. but I don't even remember. haha. :P


So many things are going on in life right now, though... AH.


I'm fucking horny.
woah.
Sorry 'bout that... I don't even know where that came from... :P

GO THERE:
http://lmaccessories.bigcartel.com/

I'm gonna buy the Unicorn necklace fo' shizzzz!!

I decided I want a guy. But we don't have any fucking mature ones at Lincoln, so I might have to resort to looking elsewhere. But I dunno where to look. D:


Ah... This is getting kinda long, and I don't want you guys to have to read, like, a whole novel every time I have a new post, so I'll finish up soon. :P

One of my favorite places to go is right here:
flickr

I'm going to start uploading my pictures on there, although they won't be anywhere near as good as all the other legit photographers on there, but whatevs.
I'll get better with time and practice.
And vomit.
What?

Here's a few of my favorite photographers on there:
Mitchell Davis (He does have a youtube, too.)
Aubirdy
Allisson Killa
Evan Birch
And... The mario guy. lawls. :P

Go. Look at their pretty pictures and become happy. :D

Rocketships and Radios

Good morning. I say this because, it is now 7:38 AM.

Don't believe me?







But it's 44° in San Francisco so all is good! :P

Ah... I haven't been very good about blogging as of late. >:(
lawls.
I've just been so busy... And my mom and dad don't ever let me get on the computer anymore anyways. And I'm just going to get upset if I talk about my parents anymore on hear because my mom has been really crazy lately and it angers me immensely. D:<>www.myspace.com/nickasaur

I love it. :)

Ah... I feel asleep last night... I'm such an idiot...

Becca and Morgan and Tim and Dyllan were all gonna come bust me out last night and we were gonna have lots of fun and it was going to be really great, but...

I FELL ASLEEP.

And I woke up this morning and I had two missed calls around midnight.
One from Becca.
One from Morgan.

I was very fucking upset. I actually said fuck. As I was laying in bed.

Yeah...

Whatevs, though.
We're all still gonna have lots of fun today...
:D

But I'm still really pissed at myself...

It's just something about this house... It makes me tired and by 11 I couldn't keep my eyes open..... D:

Oh well...
I'll just learn from this and stuff. There's nothing I can do now I suppose. :P

Hm... I think that's it. I don't know what else to really say. haha. :P

LOVE!

Sorry For The Hiatus, Kittens...

...But I'm back. ;D

I've just been real busy with... Everything. Ah...

And now I've found myself just sitting here on the end of my bed in my pajamas with some good music playing and a glass of chocolate milk, all ready to talk about my feelings.

I love.

Hehe. :)

Things have just been really happy lately... I dunno. haha.

I hung out with Bill the other day for like... An hour or so...? :P
Whatevs.
It was pretty cool, though. He seems like a pretty great guy. And I mean, he likes Pokemon, so obviously he has to be pretty cool. :P

I've felt real self-concious lately and stuff, though. It sucks. :(
And I don't really know. Haha. Like, I can never be fucking pretty enough for myself. I just feel so ugly and fat and stupid.

haha. I'm dumb.

I don't know what's wrong with me anymore.

But I'm still happy most of the time... What the f*** is up with that? haha. I'm just pretty screwed up in the head!
Weeeeeee!

But... I don't really feel like writing anything else now. So good night. :)

I love you! :D

In The Quiet Waiting.

Sometimes, you just want to sit.
And enjoy

Everything.

Because you come to the realization that you won't always be here.

What if this the last sunset I'll ever see? Or if that's the last time I'll hug a friend goodbye?

Speaking of which, there's exactly one hour until Rich turns 18.

Now 59 minutes.

As I said in my last post, I haven't updated in quite a while... :/
And I'm sorry for that.
And once again, as I said in my last post, I really did just forget about it. Haha.
:P

I dunno.

58 Minutes.

But I'm thinking that I'm gonna start blogging again, like, hardcore! >:D
Things shouldn't be quite as busy anymore anyways now that I'm not doing Romeo & Juliet...

53 Minutes.

Well, I guess I'm still doing it... Just makeup.

Fuck.

I'm sorry. I don't mean to.
I don't even know when I started swearing... It just happened one day...

56 Minutes.

55 Minutes.

54 Minutes.

I'm doing it again.
Nothing.

53 Minutes.

To answer the question you're probably thinking: yes. This is completely pointless. If you wanted to stop reading right now and go do something worthwhile then go ahead, I don't blame you.

52 Minutes.

I want to take pictures. I want to make something of my life. I want to be able to capture something ordinary and make it look new.

51 Minutes.

What is this?

50 Minutes.

I don't know what I'm doing. Everything is quite silly, including me. I can feel my skin growing older and looser and it's all too much. Really. It's going to float away.

48 Minutes.

Please, please, don't lie to me. I can handle anything but all of the fucking lying. Fuck.
I'm feeling odd. No, not really. Just kidding. I'm not really feeling much of anything.
At all. Hm.
What does it mean when your best friend ditches you to become friends with your brother? Or when your other best friend just decides she doesn't want to be friends with you anymore so she stops answering all of your fucking calls and won't give you a straight reason for why she never wants to even talk to you anymore or look you in the eyes?
I wouldn't know.

45 Minutes.

Why is music so great? I love. I can just get lost listening to anything lately. Actually, here, I'll make a little "mixed tape" for you. Except it's not a real mixed tape because then I don't know how I'd give it to you over the internet. :P
So here:

The Becoming -- Your Love
Muse -- Bliss
Disciple -- Rise Up
Anberlin -- The Feel Good Drag (Basically One of my most favorite bands and one of my most favorite songs by them. :D Plus, they're all extremely nice looking.)
The Classic Crime -- The Fight
Willet -- Taste
The Smiths -- Asleep (Beautiful song)
Tokyo Police Club -- Cheer It On
Pinback -- Boo

And that's pretty much it for now.
Aren't they nice? Boo is one of my favorite songs ever. :)

29 Minutes.

28 Minutes.

Aaaaaghgheal;sjskhfeshkjnsiojansdskjla;askljdfasjkvdn.
I'm staying awake until midnight so I can be the first to wish Rich a happy birthday, but I'm growing bored... :/

Hm...

24 Minutes.

Haha. I'm playing me some neopets. >:)

19 Minutes.

18 Minutes.

Owning n00bs on Neo...

7 Minutes.

Well. That was cute. They have some special thing going on where you can send your score on all of the games 5 times instead of 3 during the month of february, so I just earned 10000 NP in a few minutes. ;D

6 Minutes.

It was cute.

Ah... I do believe it's time for me to go now.

5 Minutes.

Love.

Everything In Moderation

Hullooooo Thur!

I know, I know, it's been FOREVS since I last posted, but I really just kinda forgot about it. Haha. :P

Annnddd... This isn't going to be anything special because I'm at Rich's and I really wanna go watch The Nightmare Before Christmas because I've never seen it before. :D

So yah.

I GOT A FREAKING SHAYMIN!!!!!!!!!!

The End.

Love.